I am Gonna Miss Everything .......

At this particular instant i am here sitting at my dad's office preparing for my exams .... but I just cant stop thinking about the fact that I'm going to leave this country in a few days. I have to leave my home and go back to my homeland . 17 glorious years in this country with my friends , family , school and everyone else. Even though I originate from India, this has now become my home because when I think about this place all I can think about is happiness... the happiness of seeing my family and friends and being with them , having fun with them ,living in the moment with them. It's like they have become a very important part of my life without which i cant function properly, and i'm incomplete without them......

Even though I can't remember everything related to my childhood... I'm sure they were joyous and happy . My Mom and dad have done sooooo much for my happiness and now we are gonna stay in 2 different countries and not be together. Even  though they don't say it I can see it in their eyes ... the sadness of parting with me , they won't say it cause they know that I won't be able to handle myself emotionally. The thing about Love towards your parents is that even though you don't always express it through words , but deep inside they mean the world to you or even more than that. When you are with your parents you have no worries cause they are always there to catch you when you take a fall, we are safe in their loving care. No matter what happens they always stand by us everyday , every second of our lives. When we are with them we forget how important they are to us at times ..... But when time comes to get out of your cozy nest and live in the wilderness of this big wide world we realize how much we are going to MISS our parents.Cause i know what it feels like .... So don't miss out any opportunities on telling your parents HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THEM ..... Through these memories they will always remember you and they will not feel sad but happy that they got a wonderful kid who always loved them and give them these wonderful memories so that they can cherish them in their darkest and saddest moments and make through it.....Well from my experience even though I fought with my dad a lot I can tell that our LOVE is really strong and when any trouble comes upon us it's gonna be ME & DADDY AGAINST THE WORLD. And my MOM WAS LIKE MY BFF i could tell her anything I wanted to.....

Well what should I tell about my friends , everyone's friends are like precious jewels to them and so are mine. (unlike some who secretly hate them wth !!! how can you even call them your friends).
The thing about friends well they are always with you in your good times and bad ... but when they are not sitting right beside you , all you have is an empty spot next to you...But you know they are always on your mind and hearts (and your cell phones) and they are just a click away. The only thing is that most of you won't be together in one place ... mostly but there are rare cases in which you manage to join in a college together... well thats good then , but what about when you don't have a choice ... like me :( well its just that I am already Missing all of them I dunno what's gonna happen when I don't see them like literally in front of me for a long long time I wonder...Cause these friends of mine are the one who were always there with me no matter what , even though they might've been angry with me or have scolded me for doing something stupid i can't live without them . You guys are my pillars which support me throughout my life <3

I AM GONNA MISS YOU GUYS
xoxoxoxoxo X infinity

Someday, Someplace, Sometime ......

Oh how much I wished i was there,
Somewhere i could run around
Do what I want
I would've just Loved it
A Place which I could call my own
Maybe i could go there
Someday, Someplace, Sometime

We can't keep waiting
So we need to move on
Holding on to the past,
It's just gonna make things Worse
Letting go is hard
But we can do it
Someday, Someplace, Sometime

It's been ages since you had this dream
But once again in life
You have come to a point
Where you have to choose .....
You can't make up your mind
But you say.... I will do it
Someday, Someplace, Sometime


Message : Never wait for Life to come to you Just go and Have it the way you want it  <3

My Dark Side

I dunno where I am going

I have no direction 

I need not be told what to do And what not

I have to learn from my own mistakes

That's all it takes to be right

I know I haven't been perfect

I am fragile , to easily broken

I have dreams of my own

I need to be left alone

That's all I am asking of you

I have a life and

I want to live it the way I planned

I go around wasting my time

I do it cause I need some answers

Without them I can't move on

I might have hurt you but

I would never do it intentionally......

You say it like you haven't done a thing to me

You try to turn and twist me

You want me to be your puppet 

You just want to keep me to yourself.....

There are another million things

That I would Love to say 

But that would not make me any better

It would just make me another GIRL

Who wants to be Heard out loud ...

Just from my memories ..... <3

Memories are what we want more than anything .......

Memories, what are these memories ..... are they happy.....are they sad .......big or small.... is it just something we want to remember or forget or a box full of crap we don't want to ever remember because it hurts so much to even look towards it.

We all have a bunch of these memories, these memories are a constant  reminder of what we did back then when we were younger... maybe it was something stupid or terribly ridiculous :P or someone who you loved alot but you couldn't anymore, or even cried for nonsensical reasons like your BFF is not talking to you or the world hates me ... that kinda stuff. But these are just the upper half of your memories just the top layer , what matters is the pain, the lesson,the good we had done, the mistakes that we remember, and promising that we would never do anything as stupid as that....

These memories still remain with us cause there is a reason greater than what we think it is, it's not always the happiest of memories that we remember .. there are these dark and sad days which we cant forget at any cost, those scars which are engraved forever in our hearts and minds it cannot be healed completely but we try , we try hard enough to pile them up with happy ones...Every small little memory of things that has happened is what makes us want them more  than ever. We would happily go back in time and re-live those wonderful memories again and again, but it wouldn't be worthwhile.Every small memory is a part of the bigger picture which might just flash before your eyes on your deathbed. 

It is at that exact moment when we realize that even though our life was filled with hardships, those were still the best days that we could ever get from our lives.It didn't matter if they were happy or sad all that matters is that we went through these annoyingly but still awesome days with our loved ones and they always stood by our sides no matter what may have come...

These memories are the only things that get us through our tough times.... I just can't imagine a life without any of these memories cause this is what reminds us who we really are and how much we have changed since then ....

My Rendezvous Trip To India - PART 1

Ohhh.... finally I am back to where I started from , it's been quite some time since i have blogged about anything well it was cause I was on vacation with my parents and my primal destination was INDIA. When we say India all that comes up in our mind is it's upbringing of various cultures in just one country .... which is not quite seen in so many other countries of the world. We all know that India kindles more than one form of religion within ... but that's not what i want to tell you all... Let me start from the very beginning

It was 19th of July when we were supposed to make our first stoppage in India that is MUMBAI, what a wonderful and interesting city it is..... now isn't it ??? It is known as the city of Dreams, the city in which every person comes to fulfill their dreams which they probably couldn't do in their territory. So Mumbai is always open to every person from any part of the world , well a city with a big heart..... well that's just the intro, back to they story we had a very tiring journey of three and a half hours and by the time we reached Mumbai it was the next day 20th of July . And on the same day we were supposed to be off for Raipur(Chhattisgarh) from Kurla Station (Lokmanya Tilak Terminus - LTT). We barely had time to catch a breath . The next thing we know is we are on the road chasing a taxi which would take us to the station. We finally got a taxi after a 30 min stand. We were already falling behind and to add up to all the mess there was a huge traffic jam which pulled us  even more behind time, and then when we reach the station

NEWS FLASH !!!!!! THE TRAIN FROM LOKMANYA TILAK TERMINUS, GYANESHWARI EXPRESS HAS BEEN CANCELLED DUE TO ANOTHER RAIL ACCIDENT

As soon as i heard that it was a thunderclap to my ears .... I was in plain shock, after all we went through this is what we get. We decided to go and ask the officials if there was any other train that could take us to our next destination Raipur. It was hard to get the tickets since there were tons of other people whose train;s were cancelled or delayed due to the same accident around six train expresses were cancelled..


That was not the only problem we had excess luggage more than what 3 people could handle with ease, so we couldn't go around looking for some place to get tickets for 3 just like that. We took shifts in order to look after the luggage. It's Mumbai so it is usually crowded and the crowds in the railways may not be so welcoming. people keep on staring at you as if you're some kind of alien that has arrived in their territory...It was my turn to stay back with the luggage and in that time slot my parents went to get the tickets , it took them 1 WHOLE HOUR to come back i was expecting my dad too but he wasn't there , only my mum was back. 

Then the both of us waited and waited for at least another 2 hours it was already 11 pm and the place seemed a bit unsafe. Both of us were worried about my father, in this strange place where we do not belong anything could happen. We were really scared just the 2 of us ... my mum said she would go to search for him alone but i was scared and told her I wouldn't wait alone on top of that with me gone too who would take care of the luggage ..???? So both of us decided to take all of the luggage FIVE BAGGAGE'S with just the 2 of us . 

As soon as we set our foot out of the station a huge crowd of men started surrounding us and asked if we needed a cab or an auto we kept on ignoring them but they just wouldn't leave it was the most terrifying thing that could have happened at that time when we both were helpless we didn't even have a sim card for Mumbai which added up to our troubles no way of communicating to my dad.

Then we finally managed to get out of that crowd and started walking towards the booking office which was not that far but with the heavy loads on our backs and weak hands we couldn't go any faster ..... that short distance in this hard time seemed to be very long than what it was . We almost gave up but then we had to go on , everyone staring and wondering where these two are going . Finally we reached to the office and there we saw my dad we were overjoyed to see him as well as angry cause he just left us there alone with no means to contact him. 

He said that he had managed to get 3 seats in the BHUVANESHWARI EXPRESS for us but the train would only leave the next morning at around 5 am , since we had no means of going back home we had to wait overnight in the booking office itself which was quite uncomfortable but when we were together there was nothing to worry about. And the next day we went on that train and reached safely to Raipur.

This experience has taught me that there are worse things in life that can happen to us than the small things we keep on whining about .... " The fear that has been kindled in the minds of the young brave heart can somehow turn out to be true unexpectedly "

Always remember that only GOD and our hopes can save us in such tough times ......

Searching for someone ...

Excuse me who are you ?? I look back at the past and ask the OLD ME ..... I try searching for those lost memories. A lot has changed over the course of time . It feels like i have already lived a lifetime and it's still 17 years of my life only. I still feel I am incomplete  need something to fill that hole in my heart. I feel like I am a new person now not knowing anything about the past. I have a lot of secrets as well like any normal person But am I still the same person or have I changed too ?? I keep on thinking....


When I look back at my past I remember a small kid who was just sitting in the corner of the class on the first day she soon learned to make friends , the next thing i know she is just hanging with guys maybe cause of the haircut ( i suppose :P)
She evolved slowly it took her some time to cope up with everyone. Trust me she loved her old school a lot she loved all of her friends a lot. though she was a quiet, little nerd but a feisty girl she managed to keep her friends close <3 This school had taught her many important things in her life which helped her most of the time.

The worst part was Leaving her first school and going to the next one ...... she wasn't happy at all but she had no choice at all but to go with the flow :( This was the worst decision ever made though everyone thought she was happy but I think deep inside she wasn't at all. going through all those old memories which could not be forgotten. Maybe there was something that could make her happy but nothing. Even though she had a fun time in her new school she still couldn't bear it anymore, she felt quite left out . She felt like an outsider as though she never belonged there or it was not her day ever. this is what she got for being a quiet girl right ??

She had to do something so that people know her more but what could she do . She tried everything possible. She changed herself completely just so that people would understand her she is the perfect example of what we can say a good girl gone bad ... well not completely but she is in the process of going bad all i can say. She used to be this bright student always scoring awesome marks but now she is nothing just someone who will never be know to anyone ..... why is her name in vain just cause of some other person she is an individual and she has the right to be who she is, Like her for who she is and not for someone who you want her to be .

it was once said that - " what you do unto others shall be done unto you "

This girl reminds me about someone who i used to know once long time ago

One After the Other

There are so many things in our life that are never ending including friendship , but i'm sure it doesn't irritate us. The never ending thing that irritates us the most are EXAMS. When we write our exams all we think about is "when is it gonna get over" , we just keep on waiting for the last day of exams. When the last day of exams are over as well we just jump out of joy, we are soo happy that we don't even care about how we performed. What can you say that's what makes everyone happy, EXAMS GETTING OVER.








But it is seriously never ending, if it gets over we start preparing for the next one and it's like we have no other choice.We just think that writing on paper, or viva are exams but they remain for the rest of our life. Every step we take or every decision we make counts. Those very steps decide whether we are going to pass this test or fail. And we wait our whole lives for this test to get over even in our ripe old age we try to get past things. We always try to feel happy even when we are tired of this crap. But obviously this will not stop us from enjoying life now will it ??

It will just slow down our pace a bit more than before ... Well that's nothing to worry about our life has many ups and downs now doesn't it. This is just one of it and nothing more. The best way to make it through is to always be prepared many of us are in the last or final year of schooling then we might just go into some college in order to take another step in our education so all we can do from our side is that we concentrate completely on our studies and keep away the distractions...... trust me there will be a lot of them that will come in our way to stop us from reaching to our destination , not the final one obviously but to take us to another level or phase of our life .... So keep working hard one day you won't regret it  :)

Well there is another option we can fight these tests or exams if we want to :P